Tag: Growth

Speaking to your child

6J8A9770

I’m popping here just for a minute to share with you this magnificant lecture that I thought EVERY parent should watch and enjoy. It’s a shame I did not have access to it when my son was between 0 and 3. It would have been much easier for me to reject all the criticism that I was getting for talking or reading too much to him. This is such an important message which basically emphasises that you should grab every minute of those early years and enjoy them with a full heart.

Play people, play, play with your kids. It’s worth it!

You can find the lecture here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSNRtJtNHT4&feature=share

Please share the link further!

When you are aware, the journey is over.

Note in Polish: Zachęcam gorąco do obejrzenia tego wykładu. Szczególnie rodziców dzieci w wieku 0 do 3 lat.

Never worry alone

on-ice

 

Apparently one of the reasons why smart people underperform is because they worry alone or they worry with the wrong people. So this coming year I’d like to suggest that instead of making a resolution list (or alongside it) we create a list of things that we really need some or a lot of help with, and commit ourselves to force, yes, force ourselves to actively ask for that help.

Over the last few months I have matured enough to understand that there are times in life when we need to look for help, and have the courage to request it. We have to be adult enough to do it, and be prepared to pay for it too in money and/or ego, but really we must learn to ask for help. It’s part of life, part of being a human being. Requesting help has nothing to do with laziness, but it has a lot to do with good judgment, with having a good understanding of where we are and what our circumstances, capabilities, limits and stumbling blocks are.

The language of requesting for help is a new sort of language for me, but this year I’ve been humbly learning to start using it. It’s liberating not having to worry all alone. Try it.

In the New Year, let’s have the courage to ask for help.

 

 

Freedom comes first

freedom

When my son was born many people were asking me about my wishes for him, about who I would like him to become, about who I would like him to be. As much as I like people to ask me questions, I disliked being asked about this one. It disagreed with my conviction that these little beings are separate beings and it is to freedom that we are bringing them up and that it is freedom that first and foremost we should allow them to experience. You see, our children are institutionalized from such an early age, their growth is formalized and lifestyle made formulaic. They need space and time that is free from our influences, and free from others. They need space and time where all that they hear is the chatter of their own minds. Uncluttered time, uncluttered from our wishes for them, however well-meaning they are.

At some stage I was really provoked by someone to answer this question: Who you would like your son to be? So I answered: I know that my ambition for my son is really my ambition for myself. If you hear me saying that I would like him to be a writer and a peace-maker, you know that this is really what I want for myself so I will be pushing myself to create the best sentences I can and pushing myself to learn the art of conflict-resolution, I will not be training my child in it. All that I need to do is to give him space for his own dreams and ambitions to emerge and flourish. Freedom comes first and our ambitions for our children can really lead us to understand what ambitions we have for ourselves.

So if they want to run, let them run.

Thrive

spring

“My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.” Dr Maya Angelou

Have you found your way to thrive?

 

Self-acceptance

A rose

“A red rose is not selfish because it wants to be a red rose. It would be horribly selfish if it wanted all the other flowers in the garden to be both red and roses.” – Oscar Wilde