Tag: marriage

Dreaming together

dreaming together 2

Every so often I’d like to find out what great spiritual leaders have to say about families. A while ago I came across a quote from a sermon of Pope Francis in which he urged families to cultivate a habit of dreaming together. I thought that it was a wonderful message to send to both parents and children. Dreaming together – we’ve got to find the time and the opportunity to do it.

In our house, dreaming together sometimes means planning our trips and holidays, organising our week or saving money for a house-improvement project, but other times it actually means sharing our enthusiasm or crazy needs, reaffirming who we are and what we want to do and who we want to be. How otherwise are we to learn who our family members actually are? How otherwise are they going to learn who we are?

This is to some extent how I see love.

Loving someone is to love their dreams.

My dream for this coming week is to fly safely to Poland (and back) to find out what my family over there dreams about. Although I do not have a white beard or red outfit, I might still be able to make things happen.

Now I’m off to pack and quiz my husband about his dreams. Hopefully, he’ll say that I’m still one of them. ;)

Do zobaczenia! (‘See you soon’ in Polish)

 

Love at home and of home

Autumn at home

Last week was very busy for our little family of three. Each of us had something special booked in our calendars. My little toddler had a sea event at his nursery to which we were invited. We were making fish, sea stars and other marine creatures out of old CDs, scraps of paper and glitter. It was really nice to get lost in an imaginary world and create part of it too.

On Saturday I had a chance to attend a one day course on portrait photography. I was learning how to create a small studio out of nothing and how to achieve different effects in portrait photography. While not all that I’ve learnt will be applied immediately, some might come in useful later on. One of the tasks that we were asked to do on the course was to go to people on the street and ask them if they would mind if we took photographs of them. I felt terribly awkward at first but then tackled the task. I made eight attempts, approached eight people and to my utter surprise, each and every one agreed! The only thing that I had to do was to ask.

I felt quite upbeat by this event but my enthusiasm for life somewhat dropped when on my way home I realised that there is a kitchen to clean, bags with food shopping to unpack, dinner to cook, piles of clothes to wash. The ends of my smile dropped. I sighed deeply before I entered the house… I walked in and… everything was done. It wasn’t a dream. It was my husband. This wonderful man who knows exactly what I need and when, who knows how to lift me up and how to keep me happy. His act of kindness energized me more than the course (so much so that I quickly washed the floors, uncluttered our desk and organised our son’s spaces). It was unbelievably enlivening and set a great tone to our weekend.

What these experiences taught me was that kindness at home tastes even sweeter than the kindness of strangers and that perhaps when it comes to caring for the house it’s great to break the chore routine every so often (either by doing it for someone or changing our focus to a different task). Variety is one of the key variables in optimal nutrition, maybe the same is true of well-nurtured and committed house-keepers.

autumn apples and conkers

“The Bride Is My Best Friend” (read the postcard)

You got yourself ready for this beautiful event and you perched quietly in a pew awaiting the bride. She is so glamorous, wonderful, wearing a glorious dress. She appears so mature and ready to take the plunge into her new life and confidently waves to her guests and sends them cheeky smiles and winks. You are smiling too, broadly, sincerely, happily… but then all of a sudden you feel this massive uncontrollable trail of tears going down your face… because you remember. … You remember her as a teenager, you remember her being strong and fragile, decisive and doubtful, sad and over the moon. In your head you go through those long private chats, the jokes that you shared, the little notes exchanged in a classroom under the table… secretly … away from the sight of the teacher. You recall the moments when things were super rough, either for you or for her and you are so grateful that in those moments you were the ‘bestest’ of friends. So you look at the bride and wipe your nose and respond to the curious look of one of the guests in a single phrase: ”The bride is my best friend” and in truth you are really the only one who understands what that signifies. The bond. The laughs. The sharing.

So your best friend is getting married. You see her blooming next to her chosen sweetheart and your heart fills up with joy and jubilation. Again, you remember what those secretly exchanged notes were about and you smile knowingly… because you realize… that a dream has just come true.

Her(1)2

Wedding: Details Matter (click to read)

My friends got married recently. I observed their wedding and the care with which they looked after every detail. I learned from them that details matter – they are at the heart of beauty and symmetry, they give character and depth and allow for a fine composition.

How important are details for you? Are you attentive to them?