Tag: Lifestyle

A house and a home

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I used to like a bit of chaos. Chaos was my state of choice. Chaos on my desk, in my bag, in my drawers and in my notebook. I found chaos conducive to work, especially for creative and innovative work… in a way I still do… the chaotic medley of thoughts… I trust them to organise themselves eventually… I trust them to come together… to create a coherent text.

The opposite is true of my house. I notice that I become less and less tolerant of a messy house. Perhaps it’s because since my son was born I spend more time at home than in the past and being, working and playing in the space that’s cluttered and covered with dust is just not fun and so I notice that the subject of a clean space appears more and more often in my conversations and my body starts leaning forward with interest when my friends and acquaintances report on their house cleaning adventures.

With the spring in its full strength, myriads of sun spells hit the surfaces in our house and all the negligence in house caring is exposed. This week therefore I am trying to use every possible minute to turn our house round and make it pleasant to be in. The windows and curtains have been washed, the surfaces, furniture, lamp shades and even ceilings have been freed from dust. The garden has also received its fair share of time and slowly space is being made for summer shrubs, herbs and flowers. This appearing neatness is making me quite happy and I hope that we’ll be able to do much more in the coming week. Our kitchen renovation project has made us slightly antisocial over the last few months and now when a significant part of it is done and many pieces of wood, screws, tools and boxes have disappeared I feel that our house can safely re-open to visitors. To me one of the main attractions of having your own space is that you can invite others to share it with you, to laugh, to talk, to eat there together. Guests play their part in turning our houses into homes, don’t they?

 

Dear Parents, this coming Sunday do not take me to a shopping mall.

Dear Parents,

This coming Sunday do not take me to a shopping mall. There’s more I want to see. There’s more I want to be…

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… than just a consumer.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*Photographs 4 and 5 taken at Derby Museum and Art Gallery

*Photograph 8 at Kedleston Hall, Derby.

Why do I blog?

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I am still slightly insecure about this blogging world. It scares me at times but I love writing and love connecting with people and I guess this blog is my method for reaching out… reaching beyond borders, beyond social grouping and time constraints.

My professional life restricts my publishing rights so I write about daily matters, values and challenges and I find that it’s enough to build bonds with people.

I had different reactions to this blog, words of encouragement and congratulations, surprise and polite or impolite critiques. Some words gave me wings, others tried to snip them. That’s life…

And it’s this life which is worth writing about… because a lot of learning happens during it that we often don’t take any notice of… because daily life is a lot to deal with and a lot to be grateful for… and to me this is fascinating… to me this is worth capturing and documenting… because we are made of small moments… we are made of everyday conversations and exchanges of smiles, winks and grimaces… we are the reflections of it all… so why not to write about it? Why not give it its due status? The daily life that’s made so infamous… because it sometimes overwhelms us with its chores, choices and charades.

I hope that with time you see more stories of people here… of the quiet celebrities of our daily lives… the people that deserve the space because they just simply are there for us and they are doing their jobs with passion… like the greengrocer that I wrote about and the glass decorator that I encountered while travelling through Wales… There are more people that I admire… a young Sardenian man that I knew as a waiter that decided to open his own little restaurant, a Cypriot mum that has been forever dedicated to bring up her sons and daughter, a picture frame maker that I meet in my local park, a professor who’s turning his knowledge into jazz music, and a young and beautiful woman who’s fighting with the not-so-uncommon mentality among young people that it’s not worth to do things for free… this woman is all about volunteering… about being society-oriented about not forgetting, about others that are less fortunate than we are. These are people that I admire. These are my celebrities and I want to write about them.

All too often the stories in the media tear people up. The Roman Colosseum in print. We are forced to be spectators of those cruel games. I refuse to sit there and watch. I had enough. Because humanity is precious and the human spirit should not be slain. We are too good for that. You are too good for that.

The truth is that on a daily basis we are also charmed and inspired… we are challenged and made curious… by events and occurrences, by our friends, family members and acquaintances, why not to pass these feelings forward… why not to write about them?

What are your reasons to write, photograph and share? How do you feel about blogging?

 

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The Life of a Market: At the Greengrocer’s

Boxes, crates and bags full of fresh fruit and vegetables are flying before my eyes. It’s early Saturday morning in the Market Hall in Derby and Rob Corden, a well-known greengrocer in the Midlands, is setting up his stall for a busy trading day. I learn from him later that he woke up that morning at 2:50am to go to the regional wholesale market to select the freshest foods for his customers. This made me realise how little I know of his trade and so I decided to find out more…

I learn that he is one of the few greengrocers who gets fully involved in the selection process of his products. Many others just phone their order through without examining the food. Rob doesn’t want to compromise the quality and freshness of his fruit and vegetables. It’s too important for him.

Rob comes from a family of greengrocers. His grandfather was a greengrocer and his father is too. Despite being educated to be an engineer, in his early thirties he decided to take over his father’s business. He’d been observing his dad since he was 5 so in his thirties he was more than well-prepared for the trade. Now he is also introducing his son to the art. It’s a family business and the warmth and family-like atmosphere is easily felt. I take my little boy there every week and he loves to observe the hustle and bustle of the market.

Those people in the market in the middle of Derby are great teachers to our children because they love what they are doing, because they are happy about their products and passionate about their work and that means that they live their lives well.

When I talk to Rob he tells me that he loves what he’s doing. You sense it from him: he knows his stuff, he’s informed. He says it’s because over the years he’s never stopped learning. There is always something to discover about food and there is always something to discover about people. Their tastes and preferences change. There are different trends and fads in the food business. There are new laws and new regulations. There are weather fluctuations that affect the quality and prices. There’s a lot to think of. There’s a lot to plan for.

When we visit the market Rob advises us what to try and how to cook it. He also tells us stories of the past and present and eagerly listens to ours because he believes that this is what buying in the market is about… about following each other’s trials and tribulations, about creating bonds within the same city, about sharing and exchanging slices of life within its community. It’s about having a very wholesome conversation face to face with different people… and talking over fruit and vegetables is just so easy… there’s no ice to break… no conventions to follow… just a banana to peel or a crispy apple to bite into.

BEYOND THE PRICE TAG, THERE’S LIFE

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There is not a single day when I don’t think about how to bring up my son, what example to set, what values to instil, what interests and talents to nourish. My choices will affect him. My choices are affecting him already.

I’m giving him a lot of freedom and I see a very curious and independent boy developing before my eyes. I talk a lot to him and I see a willing communicator emerging. I cook for him and as he stirs the pots and smells the food on the stoves I can tell that the love of cooking has been awakened in him. But I also see a boy who finds it hard to fall asleep without one of his parents next to him (because making him fall asleep in the cot was just too hard for us), a boy who demands Peppa Pig just after his dinner (because it’s much easier for his parents to clean up when the computer is on), a boy who doesn’t always take no as an answer and is very willing to explain his reasons for doing things and negotiate his rights (and he’s not even two yet… oh, long disputes before us). So I am observing and I am wondering about the future… about the years that I have with my child… about those often fleeting hours during which I can make a difference to how he sees the world… to how he understands it… to how he engages with it.

Often I get overwhelmed and confused at what I should be doing, often I just want to leave things to take their own course and just simply go about our daily life and most often this is the best option but not always… not always.

There are things that need to be shown to our children. There are things that must be experienced and made tangible. There are values that we must impress upon them and we must make an effort to do it. There are habits that we must develop. This is what parental guidance is. Parental guidance is not only about the cuddles before the sleep, it’s also about attending to the much hated habit of brushing teeth after dinner, it’s about saying no when the need arises, it’s about teaching “I’m sorry” and “Thank you” and it’s about switching off the TV after 20 minutes because it’s time for bed. It’s about those small things.. and the big ones too like hard-work, tolerance, patience, caring, perseverance, love. This is how we secure their future… by attending to seemingly insignificant details in life, to their values and to their characters.

When adults talk about securing their children future, they mean money. They always do, as if money was the ultimate gift – the antidote to insecurities, the best problem-solving tool. I feel sorry for the child for whom this is actually the truth as that means that they got themselves into debt while still playing in the sandpit…. gambling with stones, the bucket and the spade, I imagine.

Children don’t need money in their sandpits. They already have the tools and skills to feel secure. Let’s not push money and stuff down their throats telling them that they need goods to feel happy, to engage with the world and to solve their problems. The world is theirs already. The grass. The trees. The bread. The honey. The sea. It is theirs.

I want to go deeper than the price tag. Not to ignore it but to see beyond it. Because there is life beyond the price tag. Real people that touch the Earth and its gifts and creations, tangible processes and experiences, hands that work, knees that bend, heads that drop, eyes that inspect, fingers that pick. For there is life beyond the price tag, real people that touch the Earth.

Honey is not only something that can be bought for £4.15 a jar in a local supermarket. I want my son to have the awareness of this, of how it’s made and where it comes from. I want him to get the story behind the jar. To see busy bees on flowers, beehives, honeycombs, and the bee-keepers and their veiled hats. It is my duty as a parent to help my son to see and understand this. To sow the grass with him. To plant the tree with him. To make bread together and to show him a beehive. To take him to the seaside, to see a boat, fish, nets and the fisherman. For this is life.

Security comes from a firm standing on the ground, from a firm understanding of who we are and where we belong to… and we belong here – to this world, to this Earth. I want my son to touch it. To see it. To live with it. To understand that the Earth is his and that he is its.

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Back to writing earlier than expected. :) Hope you’ve enjoyed this post. x