The wind has started blowing a bit harder and the sun escapes from view much earlier these days. But home feels so cosy and just right for staying in. I like our home. I love the books scattered around the house, the remains of our toddlers’ adventures that need scooping up towards the end of each day, the fruit and vegetables in the baskets in our kitchen, even the sink still filled with pots from today’s cooking episodes. I think the universe got it right by giving us the seasons. The late autumn and winter and the cosiness that we experience of our own homes – doesn’t it support one view? That where we are is home. That where we are now we should be now, at this given moment in time. That everything is as it should be.
I will be using this winter to grow the same level of cosiness in my heart and look for every feeling in me that sends this warmth to the world and back to myself and my family.
In the corner of my mum’s attic there is an old sewing machine which is waiting to be transported to our house. It belonged to my grandmother and I can easily recall its clicking sound and the image of my grandmother’s hands bowed over it with a piece of navy blue fabric that she would use to sew a dress for one of her many granddaughters. I know that soon this sewing machine will take a prominent place in our house; somewhere between my desk for reading and writing and next to this vintage typewriter that once sat in a little closet in my husband’s childhood home, to remind me of all the things that my now deceased grandmother exemplified: discipline, work, beauty.
With the Internet being full of different approaches to decorating houses, I have been for a while thinking if I have one. I have been drawn very much to the ideas encapsulated in the Japanese ancient philosophy of Wabi-Sabi, so beautifully pictured and described here and here by my two favourite bloggers. You will learn from these posts that Wabi-Sabi is about seeing beauty in imperfections, appreciation of the ordinary, and although I feel a strong affinity for it I know that it is not me entirely. It definitely speaks to my imagination, helps me forgive myself for not being perfect, and agrees with my non-consumerist approach to the many of life matters… but I mainly draw courage from our family histories… to answer my curiosity and calling just as the people before me had the courage to do it.
Our house stores a few objects that once functional are now primarily memories of our ancestors, of people who at some time were present in our lives. We are now left with pictures, photographs, books, an old butler (the piece of furniture, not the man servant). I think that we keep those things because what we value is continuity and we appreciate what has been attempted by them. Those objects represent their dreams, their aspirations and their qualities. Sources of strength. I am delighted to live with ghosts like these.
Sometimes I think that we fall into the trap of believing that we live in the golden age and that previous thinking, products, or actions somehow did not exist in the past or were totally inferior to the present. Can we really be so smug, but at the same time so insecure, about our contemporary skills and successes? I feel that the things that we choose to surround ourselves with have the capacity to both ease our insecurity and give us the perspective that a) we are part of a story that is longer than our lifespans and b) that our lives will also become part of someone else’s history.
Isn’t it a reason good enough to live a courageous and fulfilling life abundant with gratitude?
Have you ever heard about the philosophy of edible cities? In the name of this ideal, owners of small flats and houses fill their windowsills with pots of chives and parsley, change their lawns into vegetable patches and fill their hanging baskets with tomato vines. It’s a great and straightforward way of bringing back THE REAL FOOD to your doorstep. No foil. No plastic. No packaging. Just the pure food produce pulled from the soil, your soil, and as organic as you can make it.
To me, a girl who grew up in a village with a big vegetable garden in the backyard, orchards and cold stores full of plums, apples and cherries, there is no other way of living in a city than making its surroundings edible. I need nature to feel grounded and I need contact with soil. It’s humbling and enabling at the same time. Humbling because the growth does not always happen, enabling because often it does and then you feel that you are more than just the manager of your pantry.
Thyme in winter
We’ve made a few changes in our garden this year to grow food, we have made a raised bed out of a tree that had to be felled due to its trunk forking out and we planted two small apple trees and blackcurrant, raspberry and blueberry bushes. Cherry tomatoes and small chillies are reddening in the sunnier parts of our garden. Some of our beetroots and broad beans are ready for collection and consumption. Herbs are abundant.
We had our problems. Things dried when we were away. The cucumbers just refused to grow. More than a few leaves have been eaten by slugs but to me this is an insignificant obstacle. Living in a city is not a problem either. I don’t see myself as limited by location. It’s just about getting the timing right and then learning as it all grows.
Thyme in Summer
My son is a very eager grower and an absolute real food lover. He loves helping around the kitchen and the garden. He likes to play with food too, e.g. by taking broad beans out of their shell and then putting them back. And these broad beans… wow… once they are lightly cooked, they are divine. And the smell of the herbs in the kitchen is just wonderful. Just when we cooked some of our vegetables for dinner this evening I thought that one of the reasons for growing your own food is to remember what fresh produce should smell and taste like. It’s partially to have a benchmark against which you can assess the quality of food. Personally I am not enamored with supermarkets and I hardly ever shop there for food. Human contact is too precious for me and so we shop at the market or small independent stalls and stores. We rely on my greengrocer’s great fresh food produce.
It’s my greengrocer, some of you fellow bloggers, and my parents of course who remind me that we are not only consumers, but also growers and creators, capable of influencing our surroundings. If we always choose convenience, we become so one-dimensional, so plain and flat in knowledge and experiences that we are no longer… interesting.
Say no to convenience. There is always some space between flowers for some lovely food. I am happy that I didn’t get discouraged by last year’s garden failures. We’re definitely are going to grow more from now on. It’s just really really rewarding. I hope you’ll try too, will you?
Nutrition and postnatal health are the topics that I have, over the last two years, become very interested in. In nutrition because I want my husband and son to be healthy; in postnatal health because I want to be able to enjoy these challenging early years of motherhood. I’ve been reading a lot around those subjects but also attending meetings and events in my town that addressed those topics. I am one of these people that need to be reminded and frequently directed on to the right path if I want good habits to settle in.
Here’s a list of resources that helped me…
The essential guide to foods that heal, Olivier, Suzannah [ISBN: 978-0716023272]. It is actually unbelievable how many ailments can be healed or exacerbated by the food that we eat. This guide is clear, well-written and packed with information. It’s a spring of knowledge that is really worth drinking from.
The 10 Secrets of 100% healthy people, Holford, Patrick [ISBN: 978-0749929114]. Don’t be dissuaded by the strange formulaic title. This book to me seems like a good piece of research, with surveys for you to fill in to provide health signposts. This book has helped me identify what I should focus on in my recovery. It’s not strictly about postnatal health and has wider relevance. I like this book and would easily spend a week reading it again.
Postnatal depletion even 10 years later. This is a title of an article that I have found online (Click on the title to be redirected to the site). It really explains clearly how depleted women can be in the first years of mothering. It’s a very informative and essential read.
Other sources to keep an eye on:
Mothermorphosis– The author, Dr Oscar Serrallach, who writes about postnatal depletion is about to publish a book on the subject. I have looked at its brief and have put my email on the list to be informed of its release.
Nutrition and Wellbeing – Have you heard about FutureLearn? It’s a platform that offers free courses online prepared by British universities. I have just signed up to a course on Nutrition and Wellbeing that will start running in Aug 17. The course promises to “Demystify the complex and conflicting messages we hear about diet, health and lifestyle today” and is run by University of Aberdeen. Here’s the link to the course.
The resources above provided practical knowledge to me and were great change triggers. If you decided to look at any of them or to participate in the course, I hope that you’ll find all the info that you need to increase the quality of your family life.
Over the last 6 months I have made a deliberate attempt at improving my health and raising my energy levels to exceed, or at least match, those of my toddler. I was getting progressively weaker and weaker and so decided to manage myself more thoughtfully and replenish resources. Every step I made equalled a step up on the energy ladder and I only wish now I had done it sooner. Here’s a short description of the journey to vitality that I have taken so far.
1. I started small in January. No great ambitions. All that I really wanted was to get more sleep and so I did. Often at the expense of dirty floors, windows and dishes but in all honesty I was so exhausted there was no other choice. I gave myself 5 weeks. These were 5 weeks when I was committed to live with all the undone…
The wind has started blowing a bit harder and the sun escapes from view much earlier these days. But home feels so cosy and just right for staying in. I like our home. I love the books scattered around the house, the remains of our toddlers’ adventures that need scooping up towards the end of each day, the fruit and vegetables in the baskets in our kitchen, even the sink still filled with pots from today’s cooking episodes. I think the universe got it right by giving us the seasons. The late autumn and winter and the cosiness that we experience of our own homes – doesn’t it support one view? That where we are is home. That where we are now we should be now, at this given moment in time. That everything is as it should be.
Postcards Without Stamps 